THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS

The Not So Great Outdoors

We’re writers after all, not animals

When I think of my favorite writers, I don’t spend a lot of time imagining them outside. Some of my favorite writers, and comedians, seem to be more of what Jim Gaffigan calls “indoorsy.” I think of David Sedaris, Calvin Trillin, Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Bryson, Malcolm Gladwell, and Anne Lamott and none of them write long tomes about the great outdoors. John Muir they are not. If anything, they tend to live indoors, often in or near cities, and talk about their fear, hatred or general distaste for much of the natural world.

Seth Meyers host of Late Night, once commented that he was so often frustrated by everyone’s enthusiasm for the summer season, and for the outdoors in general, because they were constantly trying to get him to go outside and everything he wanted to do was indoors.

I enjoy nature occasionally. It can be exhilarating, at least in short bursts, but much like a conversation with a lunatic, as exciting as it is, it begins to wear pretty thin in short order and you just want to remove yourself from the situation as quickly and painlessly as possible.

I have plenty of amazing memories of my time outside, from cutting firewood in the woods with my friend Bob and our dogs, riding a bike through…